O BEAUTIFUL...
O BEAUTIFUL...
By William Safire
Returning in 1894 from an inspiring trip to Pikes Peak in Colorado,a minor New England poet named Katharine Lee Bates wrote a verse she titled“America.”It was printed the following year in a church publication in Boston to commemorate the Fourth of July.
Lynn Sherr,the ABC News correspondent,has written a timely and deliciously researched book about how that verse was written and edited and how it was fitted to a hymn called“Materna,”written about the same time by Samuel Augustus Ward,whom the poet never met.In“America the Beautiful:The Stirring True Story Behind Our Nation's Favorite Song”(Public Affairs),Sherr reveals the rewriting by Bates that shows the value of working over a lyric.
“O beautiful for halcyon skies,”the poem began.Halcyonis a beautiful word,based on the Greek name for the bird,probably a kingfisher,that ancient legend had nesting in the sea during the winter solstice and calming the waves.It means“calm,peaceful”and all those happy things,but the word is unfamiliar and does not evoke the West.Spacious,however,not only describes Big Sky country but also alliterates with skies,so she changed it.
After 10 years in rewrite,a poem's every flaw is mended,and it becomes a hymn for the ages.
The often—unsung third stanza contained a zinger at the acquisition of wealth:“America!America!/God shed his grace on thee/Till selfish gain no longer stain/The banner of the free!”Sherr writes that Bates,disillusioned with the Gilded Age's excesses,“wanted to purify America's great wealth,to channel what she had originally called‘selfish gain'into more noble causes.”The poet took another crack at the line that derogated the profit motive,and the stanza now goes:“America!America!/May God thy gold refine/Till all success be nobleness/And every gain divine!”
The line that needed editing the most was the flat anddispiriting conclusion:“God shed his grace on thee/Till nobler men keep once again/Thy whiter jubilee!”That cast an aspersion on the current generation,including whoever was singing the lyric.The wish for“nobler men”to come in the future ended the song,about to be set to Ward's hymn,on a self—deprecating note.
In 1904,10 years after her first draft,Katharine Lee Bates revised the imperfect last lines of the final stanza.The new image called up at the end not only reminds the singers of the“spacious skies”that began the song but also elevates the final theme to one of unity and tolerance.Her improvement makes all the difference,especially in times like these:
America!America!
God shed his grace on thee
And crown thy good withbrotherhood
From sea to shining sea!
啊,……之美
作者:威廉·萨菲尔 译者:王季良
新英格兰一位名叫凯瑟琳·李·贝茨的不太知名的诗人,于1894年到科罗拉多州的派克斯峰作了一次激起灵感的旅行。回来后她写了一首诗,题为“亚美利加”,该诗于翌年刊登在波士顿的一个教会刊物上,以纪念七月四日国庆。
美国广播公司新闻部记者林恩·谢尔写了一本合乎时宜、而且经过津津有味研究的书。这本书讲的是这首诗是如何写成的、如何修改的,以及是如何被谱成一首叫作《Materna》的颂歌歌词的。《Materna》这首颂歌是萨缪尔·奥古斯塔斯·沃德大约在同一时间写成的。诗人与沃德从未谋面。在《美丽的亚美利加:我国人民喜爱的歌曲背后激动人心的真实故事》(公众事务出版社)一书中,谢尔指出了贝茨改写该诗的过程,这个过程显示了致力于创作抒情诗的价值。
诗的开头是:“啊,halcyon(宁静的)天空造就之美。”Halcyon是一个美丽的词,出自这种鸟———大概是翠鸟———的希腊语名称。据古代传说,这种鸟冬至时筑巢于海上,能平息海浪。它的意思是“平静的,太平的”以及种种美好事物,不过这个词不常见,不能再现西部情景。而spacious(广阔无垠的)不仅描绘有着广阔天空的地区,而且还与skies押头韵,因此她作了修改。
经过十年改写,此诗的每一个疵瑕都得到了修改,于是便成了世代传唱的颂歌
在诗中往往不受赞赏的第三节中,有一句抨击获取财富的警语:“亚美利加!亚美利加!上帝赐恩于你/直至自私的财富不再玷污/自由人的大旗!”谢尔写道,贝茨对镀金时代的过度行为深感失望,“希望涤除美国巨大财富的罪孽,把她原来称为‘自私的财富’的钱财纳入比较高尚的事业。”于是诗人对那贬损利润动机的诗句又作了一次修改,这一诗节现在的文字是:“亚美利加!亚美利加!愿上帝将你的黄金加以提炼/直到一切成功都成为高尚行为/每宗财富都崇高圣洁!”
最需要修改的那一句是诗中平淡而又使人灰心的结尾:“上帝赐恩于你/直到比较高尚的人再度庆祝/你那比较纯洁的欢乐节日!”这一结尾对当时一代人,包括吟诵着这首抒情诗的任何人,实在是种诬蔑。寄望于未来出现“比较高尚的人”使这首歌——其时即将被谱成沃德的颂歌的歌词——以自我贬低的调子作为结尾。
1904年,在完成第一稿十年之后,凯瑟琳·李·贝茨对该诗结尾一节不完美的最后几行作了修改。结尾传达的新形象不仅使咏唱者脑中浮现出歌词开头描绘的“广阔无际的天空”,而且还把最后的主题提升为团结和容忍。经她这么一改,诗的结尾便大不相同,影响巨大,尤其是在像目前这样的时代。(修改后的文字如下:)
亚美利加!亚美利加!
上帝赐恩于你
并使你的美德臻于完满
将兄弟情谊播及四海!
(美国《纽约时报杂志》)
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